By Ashley Vega, People | A musician set a clear boundary before a major gig, but then her mom threatened not to come at all. A musician turns to the Reddit community for advice following a difficult conversation with her mother about an upcoming visit.
In a post shared to the platform, the 30-year-old woman explains the emotional and logistical challenges behind setting a clear boundary with her family.
“Myself (30F) and my partner (27NB) are professional musicians,” she begins, noting they’re set to perform at an all-day festival in late October.
The couple had invited her parents to attend, but made it clear months in advance that the days surrounding the event would be packed.
Back in May, when the gig was first confirmed, the poster stressed to her parents that the lead-up week would be “stressful for us” and they wouldn’t be available for hosting.
“Important to know is that my partner has chronic fatigue, and that we plan meticulously around that to ensure that they can keep their professional commitments and promises,” she adds.
Despite that clarity, her mother called in late July, saying they were planning to stay in town for four days, coinciding with the festival.
“My heart immediately sank,” she writes. “Because my mother is very intense on the ‘let’s do things together!!!’ when she is visiting.”
She reminded her mom of their earlier conversation, as well as the work required leading up to the performance. “We would be busy with rehearsals and final preparations/checks on those days, such as packing vans, ensuring all instruments and tech are perfectly set up, and organizing our merch for the gig,” she tells her.
But her mother didn’t take it well, pushing back with alternative ideas. “She reacted negatively, exactly how I knew she would,” the musician explains.
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Go here to read more of this problem and to see how readers reacted:
https://www.msn.com/en-us/tv/celebrity/musician-asks-family-not-to-visit-before-big-gig-due-to-busy-schedule-her-mom-s-response-leaves-her-heartbroken/
Read the original article on People
https://people.com/musician-sets-boundary-before-gig-mom-threatens-not-to-visit-reddit-11782212
[COMBO Editor’s thoughts: Her mom is not treating it like her daughter’s job. She still thinks the daughter is just doing it “for fun.”]